• Home
  • Latest
  • Fortune 500
  • Finance
  • Tech
  • Leadership
  • Lifestyle
  • Rankings
  • Multimedia
CommentaryLeadership

The Biggest Mistake You Can Make When Negotiating

By
Phil Friedman
Down Arrow Button Icon
By
Phil Friedman
Down Arrow Button Icon
April 20, 2016, 10:00 PM ET
109350421
Photograph by Paul Bradbury via Getty Images/OJO Images RF

The Leadership Insider network is an online community where the most thoughtful and influential people in business contribute answers to timely questions about careers and leadership. Today’s answer to the question: How can you be a good negotiator? is written Phil Friedman, president and CEO of CGS.

Considering the range of skills and experiences that reflect what Americans seek in a leader – legislative expertise, international diplomacy, military service, to name a few – it’s telling that negotiation skills have thrust to the forefront during the 2016 presidential campaign. Maybe it’s because mastery of negotiation can evade even the most intelligent among us. Whether an investment banker or a construction worker, we all naturally respect those who know how to get what they want.

True enough, there’s both an art and a science to the deal. And while there are those who seem to demonstrate an innate ability to negotiate, usually it’s been forged out of necessity and galvanized by experience. Over the past 33 years as a business owner and CEO, I’ve learned that you can never stop refining your approach. I’ve also learned that every negotiation comes down to four key elements. Most businesspeople know the first three well but will readily discount a fourth – we’ll get to that in a moment. First, let’s sketch out the other dimensions.

See also: The Right Way to Ask For a Raise

Executives tend to focus most of their energy on terms – how many, how much, when, etc. And true enough, this first area is where you’ll likely spend the most time adjusting – but it isn’t where the heart of the deal is. It may seem obvious, but people can forget that the heart of a deal beats by addressing the mutual need. This second element is a prerequisite, and must never be sacrificed as part of a good deal. While compromise is a key ingredient of negotiation, it’s vital that concessions stay within the terms. It’s imperative that your deal successfully addresses 100% of the mutual need from the start. The third element is risk justification. Consider the potential negatives that can arise from even entering a negotiation, let alone those that come after completing the deal. Before sitting down at the table, executives should understand risk tolerances and address them as directly as possible through the terms.

Finally, there’s the final element of a deal that executives frequently discount. After an analysis entirely based on numbers and facts, too many executives are willing to abandon this signal simply because they may question the efficacy of the data source: gut feel. This is the fourth element – when the science of negotiation gives way to the art of the deal. Bottom line: If it doesn’t feel right, there’s a reason. What your gut is really trying to calculate is the sustainability of the deal. Is this something you can live with? And importantly, is this something the other side of the table can live with? A good negotiation results in a tie – both parties proceeding into an equitable, positive relationship.

To get there, make sure that all parties involved understand every detail and that business leaders drive the conversation. Negotiate directly. While it’s crucial to retain lawyers and accountants, they are there to execute your strategy, not to create it for you. Also, be certain each party involved knows the value proposition of the deal beyond the dollar signs – can the customer or partner get the product or service somewhere else? If so, what’s the advantage of working with you?

I’ve worked through countless deals and closed over 30 successful acquisitions. However, there have been deals where everything seemed to be going smoothly but, in the end, if it didn’t feel right, my gut instinct prompted me to step back. In my book, walking away from an unsustainable deal can be a real win. Through the years, what I’ve found is that mastery of the science of the deal comes from understanding the numbers and the opportunity costs – the kind of things you may well-learn in business school. But mastery of the art of the deal arises from faith in your own sense of sustainability and risk, which, like all leadership, ultimately only comes from hard-earned experience.

About the Author
By Phil Friedman
See full bioRight Arrow Button Icon

Latest in Commentary

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025

Most Popular

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Rankings
  • 100 Best Companies
  • Fortune 500
  • Global 500
  • Fortune 500 Europe
  • Most Powerful Women
  • Future 50
  • World’s Most Admired Companies
  • See All Rankings
Sections
  • Finance
  • Leadership
  • Success
  • Tech
  • Asia
  • Europe
  • Environment
  • Fortune Crypto
  • Health
  • Retail
  • Lifestyle
  • Politics
  • Newsletters
  • Magazine
  • Features
  • Commentary
  • Mpw
  • CEO Initiative
  • Conferences
  • Personal Finance
  • Education
Customer Support
  • Frequently Asked Questions
  • Customer Service Portal
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms Of Use
  • Single Issues For Purchase
  • International Print
Commercial Services
  • Advertising
  • Fortune Brand Studio
  • Fortune Analytics
  • Fortune Conferences
  • Business Development
About Us
  • About Us
  • Editorial Calendar
  • Press Center
  • Work At Fortune
  • Diversity And Inclusion
  • Terms And Conditions
  • Site Map

© 2025 Fortune Media IP Limited. All Rights Reserved. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy | CA Notice at Collection and Privacy Notice | Do Not Sell/Share My Personal Information
FORTUNE is a trademark of Fortune Media IP Limited, registered in the U.S. and other countries. FORTUNE may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Offers may be subject to change without notice.


Most Popular

placeholder alt text
Economy
America's $38 trillion national debt 'exacerbates generational imbalances' with Gen Z and millennials paying the price, warns think tank
By Eleanor PringleDecember 16, 2025
2 days ago
placeholder alt text
Success
As millions of Gen Zers face unemployment, McDonald's CEO dishes out some tough love career advice for navigating the market: ‘You've got to make things happen for yourself’
By Preston ForeDecember 16, 2025
2 days ago
placeholder alt text
Economy
The $38 trillion national debt is to blame for over $1 trillion in annual interest payments from here on out, CRFB says
By Nick LichtenbergDecember 17, 2025
14 hours ago
placeholder alt text
Innovation
An MIT roboticist who cofounded bankrupt Roomba maker iRobot says Elon Musk's vision of humanoid robot assistants is 'pure fantasy thinking'
By Marco Quiroz-GutierrezDecember 16, 2025
2 days ago
placeholder alt text
AI
IBM, AWS veteran says 90% of your employees are stuck in first gear with AI, just asking it to ‘write their mean email in a slightly more polite way’
By Marco Quiroz-GutierrezDecember 16, 2025
1 day ago
placeholder alt text
AI
'Robots are going to be amongst us': Qualcomm exec says buckle up for the next 5 years. Your car is going to be the first shoe to drop
By Nino PaoliDecember 17, 2025
21 hours ago

Latest in Commentary

layoffs
CommentaryLayoffs
The AI layoff wave is just beginning — and it’s by design
By Kevin OakesDecember 17, 2025
17 hours ago
Norbert Jung
Commentary
Factory 2030 runs on more than code. As a CEO, I see the power of agentic AI—and the trust gap that we must close
By Norbert JungDecember 17, 2025
20 hours ago
TD Jakes
CommentaryReligion
To heal a divided nation, America’s next chapter must rediscover a common unity
By T.D. JakesDecember 16, 2025
2 days ago
tree
CommentaryInflation
Colorado is suffering from Christmas Tree inflation because Denver imports most of them—from North Carolina and the Pacific Northwest
By Ali Besharat and The ConversationDecember 16, 2025
2 days ago
Charles Lamanna
CommentaryMicrosoft
I lead Microsoft’s enterprise AI agent strategy. Here’s what every company should know about how agents will rewrite work
By Charles LamannaDecember 15, 2025
3 days ago
Julian Braithwaite is the Director General of the International Alliance for Responsible Drinking
CommentaryProductivity
Gen Z is drinking 20% less than Millennials. Productivity is rising. Coincidence? Not quite
By Julian BraithwaiteDecember 13, 2025
5 days ago