Ask any parent with young children about their top concerns and chances are screen time ranks high on the list. Whether it’s the amount of time their children are spending on social media or playing video games, there is a prevailing question around how much is too much. But what if the answer lies inside their brains rather than the devices themselves?
As recently reported in NPR, “antidopamine parenting” may hold the answer to all of your parenting conundrums, or at least those associated with screens and sweets. The strategy, as described by Michaeleen Doucleff, Ph.D., a correspondent for NPR’s science desk, is designed to counteract the negative impact of dopamine, which can influence our behaviors.
What is dopamine?
Dopamine, also known as the feel-good hormone, is a neurotransmitter that acts as part of your brain’s reward system. Whereas dopamine was previously thought to provide us with pleasure, research has found that the chemical itself doesn’t make you happy. Rather, it generates another strong emotion: desire.
Simply put, “dopamine makes you want things,” University of Montreal neuroscientist Anne-Noël Samaha told NPR, adding that dopamine tells your brain to pay close attention to whatever triggered the surge in neurotransmitters. Moreover, it doesn’t matter whether you (or your child) actually finds the activity that’s contributing to the increase in dopamine pleasurable or not.
“If you talk to people who spend a lot of time shopping online or going through social media, they don’t necessarily feel good after doing it,” Samaha said. “In fact, there’s a lot of evidence that it’s quite the opposite, that you end up feeling worse after than before.”
How to implement “antidopamine parenting”
For starters, experts encourage parents to remember they’re combating chemicals, not their children.
As screen time consultant Emily Cherkin told NPR, “So I tell parents, ‘It’s not you versus your child, but rather it’s you versus a hijacked neural pathway. It’s the dopamine you’re fighting. And that’s not a fair fight.”
To help reduce conflict in your household, experts recommend the following strategies:
1. Reset before moving on. Much like it takes time for your car to go from zero to 60 mph, it will take your child’s brain a little while to come down from the dopamine high. Sure, they may be unhappy at the outset, but after two to five minutes their mood will stabilize. The key, experts say, is to put the device or sweet out of sight so that your child isn’t triggered again.
2. Find activities that make your child actually feel good. Searching for an outlet that will give your child an appropriate boost of dopamine will take some trial and error, but it’s worth it. To do that, you’ll want to pay close attention to the activities that make your child feel better after doing them and aim to incorporate more of those into your daily routine.
3. Regulate device usage (and location). Out of sight, out of mind can work for managing screen time as well. Dr. Anna Lembke, a psychiatrist at Stanford University and author of Dopamine Nation, recommends “microenvironments,” or one room in the house where children can use devices. A digital detox, wherein everyone in the family takes time away from phones and tablets, can also be helpful.
4. Substitute toxic habits with healthier habits. It may not be possible for your child to do away with technology altogether, but perhaps you can find more purposeful activities for them to do, such as swapping violent video games with more educational ones or replacing watching cartoons with a more hands-on hobby, such as puzzling or going for a walk.
