• Home
  • Latest
  • Fortune 500
  • Finance
  • Tech
  • Leadership
  • Lifestyle
  • Rankings
  • Multimedia

The Harsh Reality of Hiring Your Friends

By
Stav Vaisman
Stav Vaisman
and
Bethany Cianciolo
Bethany Cianciolo
Down Arrow Button Icon
By
Stav Vaisman
Stav Vaisman
and
Bethany Cianciolo
Bethany Cianciolo
Down Arrow Button Icon
June 19, 2016, 1:00 PM ET
Businesswomen having meeting in modern office
Photograph by David Lees via Getty Images

The Entrepreneur Insiders network is an online community where the most thoughtful and influential people in America’s startup scene contribute answers to timely questions about entrepreneurship and careers. Today’s answer to the question “What should you do when your friends ask you to hire them?” is written by Stav Vaisman, co-founder and CEO of OurPlan.

I’m certainly no stranger to mixing friends with business. I started my company with a friend, raised money from friends, have hired friends, and will continue to hire my friends. I’ve fired some friends, too.

People who want to work at startups usually crave that informal social environment. And friendships are an integral part of the environment startup founders want to cultivate in the workplace. But we’re still doing business, and your friends need to know that business always comes before the friendship in the context of work.

I’ve arrived at three initial ground rules for mixing friends with business:

Assume leadership
I’m straightforward about the fact that the friendship is about to change. I’m now the boss. I always have a deep, candid conversation with my friends before I hire them. Our friendship precedes the work relationship, but the work relationship now takes precedence over the friendship. Sure, startups are informal, collegial environments. But every business still needs leaders to make decisions, evaluate performance, and, if necessary, terminate. If you can hire a friend, you’ve got to be prepared to fire a friend. And your friends must know the risks that come with inserting business into the friendship.

See also: More Entrepreneurs Should Consider Hiring Their Friends

Prepare for change
All relationships change over time, but the friendship can experience rapid change as a result of the business environment. I recently experienced this when a close childhood friend of mine enthusiastically sought a position at OurPlan, and we decided to hire him. As the demands of the business grew, I came to realize that my friend simply lacked the qualifications for the new roles and responsibilities of the position. Given our background, I knew I had to manage this situation differently than a normal termination. I took my friend to lunch, talked to him about his skill set, and provided an honest review of his inability to meet our needs at that time. He thanked me for my time and the opportunity, and today we are even closer than we were before. Our relationship rapidly progressed through several stages as a result of mixing friendship with business, but we overcame the challenges as we both embraced the inevitable nature of change.

 

Establish a meritocracy
Let’s be frank. Friends who ask you for a job are leveraging their relationship with you to get a job. There’s nothing wrong with that. We all use social networking to promote our careers. But a problem emerges when friends attempt to leverage the relationship to protect their job or advance their position—regardless of their performance. Your friend must know that your firm operates as a meritocracy. Performance is paramount—no playing favorites. Your friends must know that their ability to leverage the relationship ended once they got the job. Now they’ve got to perform.

In my experience working with friends, I’ve found that the unique nature of the friendship can add value to the business relationship. My insight into their personalities, strengths, and weaknesses is much greater given our friendship. This interpersonal foundation can be the basis for a productive business relationship as both parties bring out the best in each other. By assuming leadership, preparing for change, and establishing a meritocracy, I’m more likely to ensure that mixing business with friendships overcomes the risks and maximizes the rewards.

About the Authors
By Stav Vaisman
See full bioRight Arrow Button Icon
By Bethany Cianciolo
See full bioRight Arrow Button Icon

Latest in

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025

Most Popular

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Rankings
  • 100 Best Companies
  • Fortune 500
  • Global 500
  • Fortune 500 Europe
  • Most Powerful Women
  • Future 50
  • World’s Most Admired Companies
  • See All Rankings
Sections
  • Finance
  • Leadership
  • Success
  • Tech
  • Asia
  • Europe
  • Environment
  • Fortune Crypto
  • Health
  • Retail
  • Lifestyle
  • Politics
  • Newsletters
  • Magazine
  • Features
  • Commentary
  • Mpw
  • CEO Initiative
  • Conferences
  • Personal Finance
  • Education
Customer Support
  • Frequently Asked Questions
  • Customer Service Portal
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms Of Use
  • Single Issues For Purchase
  • International Print
Commercial Services
  • Advertising
  • Fortune Brand Studio
  • Fortune Analytics
  • Fortune Conferences
  • Business Development
About Us
  • About Us
  • Editorial Calendar
  • Press Center
  • Work At Fortune
  • Diversity And Inclusion
  • Terms And Conditions
  • Site Map
  • Facebook icon
  • Twitter icon
  • LinkedIn icon
  • Instagram icon
  • Pinterest icon

© 2026 Fortune Media IP Limited. All Rights Reserved. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy | CA Notice at Collection and Privacy Notice | Do Not Sell/Share My Personal Information
FORTUNE is a trademark of Fortune Media IP Limited, registered in the U.S. and other countries. FORTUNE may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Offers may be subject to change without notice.


Most Popular

placeholder alt text
C-Suite
OpenAI’s Sam Altman says his highly disciplined daily routine has ‘fallen to crap’—and now unwinds on weekends at a ranch with no cell phone service
By Jacqueline MunisFebruary 5, 2026
1 day ago
placeholder alt text
Politics
Meet the Palm Beach billionaire who paid $2 million for a private White House visit with Trump
By Tristan BoveFebruary 3, 2026
3 days ago
placeholder alt text
Success
After decades in the music industry, Pharrell Williams admits he never stops working: ‘If you do what you love everyday, you’ll get paid for free'
By Emma BurleighFebruary 3, 2026
3 days ago
placeholder alt text
Travel & Leisure
How Japan replaced France as the country young Americans obsessively romanticize—they’re longing for civility they don’t see at home
By Nick LichtenbergFebruary 5, 2026
2 days ago
placeholder alt text
Investing
Ray Dalio warns the world is ‘on the brink’ of a capital war of weaponizing money—and gold is the best way for people to protect themselves
By Sasha RogelbergFebruary 4, 2026
2 days ago
placeholder alt text
Economy
Trump is giving the U.S. economy a $65 billion tax-refund shot in the arm, mostly for higher-income people, BofA says
By Nick LichtenbergFebruary 5, 2026
2 days ago

Latest in

North Americademographics
U.S. births dropped last year, offsetting 2024’s increase and dashing hopes for an upward trend
By Mike Stobbe and The Associated PressFebruary 6, 2026
3 hours ago
PoliticsBarack Obama
Trump’s racist post about Obamas is deleted after bipartisan backlash. The White House initially defended it, then blamed a staffer
By Bill Barrow, Josh Boak and The Associated PressFebruary 6, 2026
4 hours ago
CryptoBitcoin
What caused the massive Bitcoin crash? Clues point to a blow-up at Hong Kong hedge funds
By Jeff John RobertsFebruary 6, 2026
5 hours ago
InvestingDow Jones Industrial Average
Dow soars by 1,200 points to top 50,000 for the first time as chipmakers and airlines lead ferocious stock market rebound
By Stan Choe and The Associated PressFebruary 6, 2026
5 hours ago
CEO and co-founder of Anthropic Dario Amodei speaking on stage.
AIAnthropic
Anthropic’s newest model excels at finding security vulnerabilities—but raises fresh cybersecurity risks
By Beatrice NolanFebruary 6, 2026
7 hours ago
Personal FinanceCertificates of Deposit (CDs)
Best certificates of deposit (CDs) for February 2026
By Glen Luke FlanaganFebruary 6, 2026
8 hours ago