• Home
  • Latest
  • Fortune 500
  • Finance
  • Tech
  • Leadership
  • Lifestyle
  • Rankings
  • Multimedia
Satire from Fortune

23andMe Offers Pared-Down Test, Tells You If You’re Michael Douglas

By
Ashwin Rodrigues
Ashwin Rodrigues
Down Arrow Button Icon
By
Ashwin Rodrigues
Ashwin Rodrigues
Down Arrow Button Icon
June 7, 2018, 1:04 PM ET
Premiere Of Columbia Pictures' "Flatliners" - Arrivals
LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 27: Actor Michael Douglas attends the premiere of "Flatliners" at The Theatre at Ace Hotel on September 27, 2017 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Jason LaVeris/FilmMagic)Jason LaVeris—FilmMagic

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. — After the latest security breach at MyHeritage involving 92 million user accounts, genomics company 23andMe is adapting to consumer’s increased demand for privacy-sensitive genetic testing with its latest product.

The maker of at-home DNA testing kits, 23andMe has previously marketed to Americans hoping to trace back their ancestry, or unearth genetic dispositions to certain diseases. Consumers have started to ask questions around the data collected by companies like 23andMe, specifically, who owns it. The Federal Trade Commission has also warned consumers before taking test like 23andMe’s, given the highly sensitive nature of the data being exposed and collected.

The company responded in an unlikely way. For the cost of twelve dollars, 23andMe will now offer a test which will tell you if you are the 73 year-old actor and producer Michael Douglas.

A spokesperson for 23andMe provided the following statement:

“Privacy is our number one priority. Still, we understand some consumers are unable to reach the level of trust required to take our traditional DNA test. We believe we’ve found a solution, which is both cost-effective and informative, for anyone who wants to know if they starred in Wall Street, Traffic, or Ant-Man.”

The spokesperson explained how the pared-down version of the test would work. Consumers would take a digital photo of themselves, and mail it in to 23andMe’s testing center. A team of biologists and celebrity forensic analysts would analyze the photo, and within 20-25 business days, provide an analysis.

“I was not consulted before this product was launched,” said actor and producer Michael Douglas, “but I intend to take the test, just in case.”

For additional security, 23andMe is weighing the cost and benefits of moving the entire test to Snapchat.

 

For more satire from Fortune, click here.

About the Author
By Ashwin Rodrigues
See full bioRight Arrow Button Icon

Latest in

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025

Most Popular

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Fortune Secondary Logo
Rankings
  • 100 Best Companies
  • Fortune 500
  • Global 500
  • Fortune 500 Europe
  • Most Powerful Women
  • World's Most Admired Companies
  • See All Rankings
  • Lists Calendar
Sections
  • Finance
  • Fortune Crypto
  • Features
  • Leadership
  • Health
  • Commentary
  • Success
  • Retail
  • Mpw
  • Tech
  • Lifestyle
  • CEO Initiative
  • Asia
  • Politics
  • Conferences
  • Europe
  • Newsletters
  • Personal Finance
  • Environment
  • Magazine
  • Education
Customer Support
  • Frequently Asked Questions
  • Customer Service Portal
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms Of Use
  • Single Issues For Purchase
  • International Print
Commercial Services
  • Advertising
  • Fortune Brand Studio
  • Fortune Analytics
  • Fortune Conferences
  • Business Development
  • Group Subscriptions
About Us
  • About Us
  • Press Center
  • Work At Fortune
  • Terms And Conditions
  • Site Map
  • About Us
  • Press Center
  • Work At Fortune
  • Terms And Conditions
  • Site Map
  • Facebook icon
  • Twitter icon
  • LinkedIn icon
  • Instagram icon
  • Pinterest icon

Latest in

elon
LawOpenAI
Elon Musk gets testy on the stand: ‘I thought I had started a nonprofit with OpenAI but they stole it’
By Barbara Ortutay and The Associated PressMay 1, 2026
51 minutes ago
duke
Big TechAmazon
Amazon Prime Video reaches deal with Duke Blue Devils to air 3 games per season
By The Associated PressMay 1, 2026
54 minutes ago
valerie
CommentaryLayoffs
Tesla’s former HR chief: the AI layoff panic Is built on a false premise—here’s what most workers need to know
By Valerie Capers WorkmanMay 1, 2026
1 hour ago
AI
AIdisruption
Meet the Americans dismissing AI hype and using it with ingenuity: ‘The efficiencies gained out of it have been tremendous’
By Cathy Bussewitz and The Associated PressMay 1, 2026
1 hour ago
bessent
Personal FinanceFinancial Literacy
Scott Bessent on financial literacy: ‘it drives me crazy’ to see young men in blue-collar construction jobs playing the lottery
By Fatima Hussein and The Associated PressMay 1, 2026
1 hour ago
Top CD rates from major banks May 1, 2026: Chase CDs, Bank of America CDs, Citibank CDs, and more
Personal FinanceCertificates of Deposit (CDs)
Top CD rates from major banks on May 1, 2026: Chase CDs, Bank of America CDs, Citibank CDs, and more
By Joseph HostetlerMay 1, 2026
1 hour ago

Most Popular

China dominates the world's lithium supply. The U.S. just found 328 years' worth in its own backyard
North America
China dominates the world's lithium supply. The U.S. just found 328 years' worth in its own backyard
By Jake AngeloApril 30, 2026
20 hours ago
Apple cofounder Ronald Wayne—whose stake would be worth up to $400 billion had he not sold it in 1976—says that at 91, he has no regrets
Success
Apple cofounder Ronald Wayne—whose stake would be worth up to $400 billion had he not sold it in 1976—says that at 91, he has no regrets
By Preston ForeApril 27, 2026
4 days ago
Accenture's Julie Sweet blew up 50 years of company history. She says the hardest part is still ahead
Conferences
Accenture's Julie Sweet blew up 50 years of company history. She says the hardest part is still ahead
By Nick LichtenbergApril 29, 2026
2 days ago
America shot its arsenal empty in 2 wars. Now it needs Beijing's permission to reload
Commentary
America shot its arsenal empty in 2 wars. Now it needs Beijing's permission to reload
By Steve H. Hanke and Jeffrey WengApril 30, 2026
21 hours ago
Google Cloud revenue is now 18% of Alphabet's business. Is this the beginning of the end of Google's search identity?
Big Tech
Google Cloud revenue is now 18% of Alphabet's business. Is this the beginning of the end of Google's search identity?
By Alexei OreskovicApril 29, 2026
2 days ago
Exclusive: America's largest Black-owned bank launches podcast with mission to unlock hidden shame holding back generational wealth
Banking
Exclusive: America's largest Black-owned bank launches podcast with mission to unlock hidden shame holding back generational wealth
By Nick LichtenbergApril 29, 2026
2 days ago

© 2026 Fortune Media IP Limited. All Rights Reserved. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy | CA Notice at Collection and Privacy Notice | Do Not Sell/Share My Personal Information
FORTUNE is a trademark of Fortune Media IP Limited, registered in the U.S. and other countries. FORTUNE may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Offers may be subject to change without notice.