World Cup frenzy is in full force after the kick-off match on Thursday, and while it may not bode well for Brazil’s economy, according to a recent Fortune article, at least we can all sit-back and enjoy the game.
Especially important when discussing Brazil’s beloved players are their nicknames, which help define the soccer stars and give them an tinge of mystery. Think “Fred” for Brazilian player Frederico Chaves Guedes or “Hulk” for Givanildo Vieira de Souza.
But here at Fortune, we’re wondering, what would some of the top Fortune 500 CEOs’ names be if they traded the boardroom for the soccer field?
Does another CEO and potential nickname particularly strike you? Or maybe you’re curious what your own name might be? Check out the name generator here, which we used to help devise some of the names, and make sure to comment below.
1 Mary “Recall” Barra
Company: General Motors (GM)
With all the news swirling around GM recently with their 38 auto recalls, there may, unfortunately, be no better name than “Recall” for Mary Barra. A little mean-spirited? Yes. But it’s a step up from the generator’s version of her name: Felix Barrito. (Note: that’s an “a” not a “u.”)
Another possibility? “Firebird.” She considers the Pontiac Firebird a favorite.
2 Lloyd “Blankfeinho” Blankfein
Thank the name generator for that gem. The CEO of Goldman Sachs since 2006, he was born and raised in the Bronx and attended Harvard undergrad and Harvard Law School. He doesn’t appear to have much of a connection to soccer, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve a cool name of his own.
3 Warren “Oracle of Omaha” Buffett
Company: Berkshire Hathaway
This may be breaking the trend of one-word names, but then again, Buffett is larger than life and has been known as the “Oracle of Omaha” for his investment picks. The 83-year-old Nebraska native, a known sports fan, even went so far as to make a pretty big bet during the 2010 World Cup in South Africa.
According to a Bloomberg report, if France had won the event, he would’ve had to pay a pretty steep sum to an anonymous client. “I think we’re going to lose 30 million bucks or something like that” if France wins, Buffett is quoted as saying.
4 Ursula “Ursulosa Da Costa” Burns
Company: Xerox (XRX)
This name was too good to pass up from the generator. Ursolosa Da Costa (which really rolls of the tongue, doesn’t it?) is also apparently a sports fan. In 2008, she was appointed to the United States Olympic Committee’s board of directors.
That aside, the name “Papercut” might not be all too shabby either.
5 Jamie “Whale Hunter” Dimon
Company: JP Morgan (JPM)
In the infamous case back in 2012, the U.S. Senate published a report saying that Dimon misled investors due to a derivatives bet by the “London Whale” Bruno Iksil. So, maybe “Whale Hunted” might be a better nickname for Dimon, although we there’s a famous line from the case that can’t go untouched. Responding to the media attention surrounding the bets, Dimon reportedly told investors that the whole situation was a “complete tempest in a teapot.”
6 Elizabeth “New Blood” Holmes
The cover CEO of the latest issue of Fortune, Elizabeth Holmes founded the blood diagnostics company, Theranos, when she was just 19 and while still at Stanford. Able to run a slew of tests on a tiny vial of blood from a pinprick, Holmes, or shall we say New Blood, is revolutionizing the industry.
On the soccer field, she’d likely be a prized captain. In fact, according to Fortune, she’s assembled what “may be the single most accomplished board in U.S. corporate history.”
7 Ellen “Kulma” Kulman
Company: DuPont (DD)
Short and sweet. A Brazilian-inspired nickname worthy of “Hulk” and “Fred,” Ellen Kulman gets “Kulma” for hers, according to the handy name generator.
She’s also been a team player in the past, having been a member of Tufts University’s basketball team, according to the Women’s Sports Foundation. Not quite soccer, but it’ll do.
8 Doug “McMillundo” McMillon
Company: Wal-Mart (WMT)
The CEO of Wal-Mart, which tops this year’s Fortune 500 list, Doug “McMillundo” McMillon isn’t to be mixed up with the former Scottish-American forward Doug McMillan. The long-time Wal-Mart employee has been a company staple on and off for nearly three decades, starting as a summer associate at a Wal-Mart warehouse in 1984 and becoming the CEO in 2014. That’s the kind of dedication any World Cup champion needs to bring home the title.
9 Virginia “Kappa Kappa Gamma” Rometty
Company: IBM (IBM)
A former president of her sorority Kappa Kappa Gama from her Northwestern days, the nickname was a no-brainer, although she typically goes by “Ginni.” She became the CEO of IBM in 2012.
According to the name generator, her nickname could also be “Virginialdo,” which is pretty fantastic.
10 Mark “Sandals” Zuckerberg
Company: Facebook (FB)
Once known for wearing his signature Adidas sandals everywhere he went, the Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has since evolved from that attire. At least a little bit. But the nickname should still stick.
Plus, for some reason, the name generator dubbed him Mcos.