50 Bulls**t Jobs: Loan officer

April 26, 2007, 8:56 PM UTC

Just a few ways to be profitably and pleasantly (if uselessly) employed, from Stanley Bing’s book, “100 Bulls**t Jobs and How to Get Them” (Harper Collins).

A reader from Minneapolis writes:

LOAN OFFICER: $$ 24K to 200K

Good:  Lots of money to tell older, more experienced people what to do with their money, and when to do while at the same time charge a hefty origination fee.  Everyone else in the mortgage world makes money off of you, and therefore kisses your behind.

Bad: Cutthroat industry where your cubemate will kill you for a loan application, or rates go up and you can’t book a loan for a month. You go broke, have to return the Jag, and can never face your “former” friends in public.  No more bottle service.

Ugly: Your borrowers will always feel that they found a better deal 2 years after the fact, and be mad that they couldn’t get the same loan that their mom’s brother’s friend’s sister got.  Then, they will make late payments, charge up their newly-paid off credit cards, and then turn you into the state.  The state will then close you down, and you will be out of work.

Next stop:  Psych ward, immediately after you home gets foreclosed on because you can’t make your sky high payments (that you really couldn’t afford to begin with)

Worst Enemy: Karma

Readers, what do you think? Is this a bulls**t job?