Last year, Abrams had delicately cleaned the tombstone of Mary Bailey, who died in 1852 at just 21 years old. The still-pristine white marble stone stood out compared to the neighboring grave, holding Bailey’s sister Eliza, covered in grime and moss collected over the decades.

Working in quick, gentle strokes, Abrams used her brush and sprayer to peel away dirt hiding the floral details on Eliza’s grave before moving to the next.

“Sometimes you can definitely see a difference right away,” she said. “Other times, it’s a month later you’ll come back and go ‘oh my gosh, it’s beautiful.’”

Abrams is one of the many social media creators who have found success posting videos of themselves cleaning graves. They can attract large audiences, often including those looking for cleaning content or videos with repetitive and subtle sounds known for their calming effect.

Cleaning graves grew in popularity during the pandemic

The trend was particularly popular during the COVID-19 pandemic as people searched for safe hobbies, finding connections over death during a pandemic. It’s also sparked criticism, with some worried that strangers are capitalizing on gravesites without notifying descendants and risking damaging the sites.

Yet Abrams doesn’t solely focus on the cleaning process. She researches and then shares the details she has found of the individual lives in her videos while filming the moss and buildup being washed away. Abrams focuses on 18th and 19th century headstones in remote yet picturesque graveyards in Vermont, and her viewers are drawn to her deep dives into the past that also touch on the dark nature of death and spirits.

“I let them pick me,” Abrams said, referring to how she selects what graves to clean. “I’m drawn to it and kind of look at it and see how I feel.”

Abrams likes to focus on the stories of young women and children, pointing to the connection she has as a mother of two in a world where men’s stories are often elevated.

Yet researching the dead takes time. It requires Abrams to cross-reference birth, marriage and death certificates, as well as newspaper clippings.

“It’s like journalism, but for dead people,” she joked.

The number of stories in America’s graveyards is seemingly endless

While there’s no central agency counting how many cemeteries are in the U.S., data visualization expert Joshua Stevens attempted to map more than 144,000 of the nation’s graveyards and cemeteries, many of which not only could use a good cleaning but also need restoration and preservation.

Online interest in the labor surrounding the upkeep of graveyards is encouraging, but can be a double-edged sword, said John Appell, a monument and gravestone restoration professional and CEO of Atlas Preservation.

“This is not a blanket statement, but there’s certainly a significant number of people that seem to be out there that kind of just want fame,” he said.

Without proper training, graves can become damaged with aggressive brushing or crumble if handled too roughly, he said. An amateur genealogist in 2021 admitted she had scrubbed roughly 200 gravestones at a Maryland cemetery in a way that left them damaged.

Workshops for volunteer cleanup efforts are one way to learn the skill before heading out to your local cemetery. In 2016, hundreds of volunteers in Louisiana helped restore a cemetery dating back to the Civil War.

“Cleaning is just one aspect of a much bigger subject,” Appell said, pointing to the need to also preserve monuments and structures inside historic cemeteries.

Some cultures clean graves as a regular ritual

Abrams agreed that proper cleaning, as well as permission from cemeteries, are crucial before setting out to clean a grave.

Brushing off tombstones is a regular ritual in some cultures, including in Mexico where entire families clean and decorate graves, which are covered with orange marigolds for Day of the Dead. The holiday begins Oct. 31, remembering those who died in accidents; it continues Nov. 1 to mark those who died in childhood, and then those who died as adults on Nov. 2.

In the United States, cemeteries were among the country’s first public parks where communities could come together, Abrams said. But that sentiment has been lost over the years in the U.S. She hopes her work can help remove the fear surrounding cemeteries.

“I like the idea of a cemetery as a place where people can come and be and exist with the people who have passed before us,” she said.

___

Kruesi reported from Providence, Rhode Island.