Last week the river broke its banks and splashed onto CNN, providing viewers welcome relief from hard news of terror and war.

But the story didn’t go quite the way Apple had scripted it. What was supposed to be a two-week walkup to its big Sept. 9 media event was highjacked — by accident or design — by nude celebrities.

Apple declined to comment on what must have been seen at corporate headquarters as a public relations disaster. But using the sequence of headlines on Techmeme as a proxy for the news flow — we can reconstruct the events.

They unfolded in three stages:

• Apple starts the drumroll: Tim Cook grants an interview with Walt Mossberg, one of the late Steve Jobs’ favorite press conduits. It’s about the iPad, of all things, but it reminds news editors that Apple is about to launch its fall lineup.
• The story gets highjacked: British newspapers report that someone has released a large cache of celebrity nudes, many stolen from password-protected photostreams stored on Apple’s iCloud servers. The story is invariably linked to reports that Apple is set to unveil a new “secure” mobile payment system.
• Apple launches a counter-offensive: As the company tries to minimize the damage — with an official statement and another Cook interview — a series of leaks (authorized and unauthorized) eventually brings the media’s attention back to Tuesday’s event.

Below: The stories that topped the Techmeme news feed each morning when the financial markets opened (unless otherwise noted).

• Tim Culpan, Adam Satariano and Ian King, Bloomberg: Apple Said to Prepare New 12.9-Inch iPad for Early 2015
• Walt Mossberg, re/Code: Tim Cook says the recent slump in iPad sales is just a “speed bump”

 
Thursday, Aug. 28

• John Paczkowski, Re/code: Apple plans to announce a new wearable with HealthKit and HomeKit integration September 9

Friday, Aug 29:

• Juli Clover, MacRumors: Apple builds a hidden structure at Flint Center, site of Mac unveiling, ahead of Sept. 9 event
• Jim Dalrymple, The Loop: Apple announces special event for September 9 with tagline “Wish we could say more”

 
Sunday, Aug. 31:

• Paul Ferrell, The Guardian: Nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence and others posted online by alleged hacker (This story didn’t make Techmeme)

 
Monday, Sept. 1 (morning)

• Matt Townsend, Bloomberg: Apple partnering with Visa, Mastercard, and American Express to let iPhone 6 owners use their phone to pay for goods in physical stores
• Dawn Chmielewskire and John Paczkowski, re/Code: Apple has considered a $400 price for its wearable device, with some models priced lower

Monday, Sept. 1 (afternoon)

• Charles Arthur, The Guardian: Nude celebrity picture leak looks like phishing or email account hack

Tuesday, Sept. 2

• Arik Hesseldahl: re/Code: Apple Says It Is “Actively Investigating” Celeb Photo Hack
• Charles Arthur, The Guardian: Naked celebrity hack: security experts focus on iCloud backup theory

 
Wednesday Sept. 3 (morning)

• Andy Greenberg, Wired: The Police Tool That Pervs Use to Steal Nude Pics From Apple’s iCloud
• Apple: Celebrity photo theft a targeted attack on names, passwords, and security questions, and didn’t result from breaches of Find my iPhone or iCloud
• Nik Cubrilovic, New Web Order: A look inside the hacker networks dealing in stolen celebrity data
• Michael Rose, TUAW: Apple’s two-factor authentication doesn’t cover restoring a new device from an iCloud backup, a known issue affecting data security
• Chris Soghoian, ACLU: Lessons From the Celebrity iCloud Photo Breach
• Jacob Kastrenakes, The Verge: While Apple denies that iCloud was “breached”, it doesn’t deny iCloud was involved in the celebrity photo theft
• Matthew Panzarino, TechCrunch: Apple Should Be More Transparent About Security

 
Wednesday, Sept. 3 (afternoon)

• Samsung Mobile Press: Samsung announces 5.7″ Galaxy Note 4 and 5.6″ Galaxy Note Edge with curved display on one edge

 
Thursday, Sept. 4

• Brad Molen, Engadget: Microsoft launches $433 Lumia 830 mid-range phone with 10MP PureView camera, will ship with Lumia Denim
• Mark Gurman, 9to5Mac: Apple design head Jony Ive ahead of iWatch debut: ‘Switzerland is in trouble’

 
Friday, Sept. 5

• Brian X. Chen, New York Times: New, larger iPhones to offer one-handed mode for easier typing; iWatch circuit board is “tiny”
• Jordan Kahn, 9to5Mac: Apple announces live stream for Sept. 9 iPhone/iWatch event
• Lorraine Luk, Daisuke Wakabayashi and Greg Bensinger, Wall Street Journal: Apple’s smartwatch will come in two sizes, both with curved OLED screens and NFC

 
Saturday, Sept. 6

• Kia Makarechi, Vanity Fair: Renowned industrial designer Marc Newson to join Apple’s design team, will remain based in UK
• Jason Del Rey, Re/code: Apple iPhone’s Mobile Payments Expected to Include CVS and Walgreens
• Adam Satariano, Businessweek: Behind Apple’s program to devise quick fixes in the factory for glitches found in new devices

• Mark Gurman, 9to5Mac: Apple wearable to run third-party apps, big developers already seeded SDK
• Christina Farr, Reuters: Apple has invited several top fashion editors and bloggers to its Tuesday media event
• Eric Slivika, MacRumors: Apparent Working 4.7-Inch iPhone 6 Reveals Home Screen Layout, Passbook Icon With Payments
• Matthew Panzsrino, TechCrunch: Apple Dominating Shipping Capacity Out Of China With New iPhones
• Pamela Engel, Business Insider: Reddit Just Banned The Subreddit Where People Were Posting The Celebrity Nude Images

Except for press releases and officially sanctioned interviews, it’s hard to tell which of these stories were plants and which unauthorized leaks.

And while it’s tempting to speculate about the timing of the release of those celebrity nudes, at this point there’s no way to know for sure where they came from. The FBI is on the case.

Meanwhile, you can expect the drumroll to grow louder as we get closer to Tuesday, when the story will be — at least for a couple hours — under Apple’s complete control.

See also: Inside Apple Inc.’s spin machine

Follow Philip Elmer-DeWitt on Twitter at @philiped. Read his Apple (AAPL) coverage at fortune.com/ped or subscribe via his RSS feed.