Toilet lights and adult bibs are just the beginning.
While there are certainly some real bargains available to Amazon Prime members during Prime Day 2017, you can’t put more than 100,000 items on sale without having a few duds in the mix.
There might not be as many questionable items as there were during the site’s first observation of this made-up retail holiday, there are still plenty of things you’re better off avoiding. For example:
LED Toilet Lights – Sure, it’s nice to not have to blind yourself during those 3 am bathroom runs, but do you really need a toilet that alternates between 16 glowing colors? Even at $12, these toilet bowl lights tip the tacky scales. If you want your toilet water to glow green, just chug a few Mountain Dews.
Chambong – We’ll be the first to agree that champagne flutes are too small. But there’s a difference between enjoying champagne enthusiastically and chugging it like a Schlitz. This $20 glassware certainly lives up to the name, blending a flute and bong into a single item, letting you down six ounces of bubbly in seconds. It’s a great way to make an impression at your next high-end social gathering.
Adult Bibs – Are you incapable of feeding yourself without ruining your shirt and pants? Do you not trust yourself when ordering spaghetti? These $11 extra long bibs have a soft terry top and are waterproof. For the person who wears a lobster bib and thinks, “This just isn’t humiliating enough.”
Dog Pajamas (with Monkey Pattern) – Seriously, this $11 outfit is why your canine companion chews up your shoes when you turn your back.
Zollipops – We hate to be too snarky about this 150-count bin of “the clean teeth pops” since they were invented by a nine-year old entrepreneur. But just brush your teeth regularly and cut back on the Jolly Ranchers and you’ll be better off than spending the $21 here.
Bluetooth-enabled Air Guitar Pick – It was only a matter of time before someone created an app for air guitar players—and an oversized bluetooth pick to go with it (for $50, no less!). Look, you’re going to look goofy enough shredding in silence with your earbuds wedged in your ear. Don’t double down on the dorkiness.