By Dan Primack
August 21, 2013

FORTUNE — Twitter is beginning to speak with bankers about its inevitable IPO, according to the New York Post. No real surprise, except for this quote:

Twitter’s executive suite — comprising CEO Dick Costolo, operations chief Ali Rowghani and newly appointed finance chief Mike Gupta — have shared a few concerns with the bankers. Among them, the 7-year-old San Francisco tech company wants an offering that’s “low profile,” one source said.

Say what now?

I don’t care if you only try to raise $50 million, or file your registration the day before Christmas. I don’t care if you set a price range 99% below where your comps are trading, or if you only sell to folks who stubbornly stick with the old Tweetdeck. I don’t care if you use a Dutch Auction or a Sotheby’s Auction.

It. Will. Be. High. Profile.

The NY Post adds this about the “low profile” comment:

The concern seemed to reference Facebook’s $15 billion botched offering as something Costolo’s crew wanted to avoid, sources said.

For starters, Facebook (FB) raised $16 billion (which is many things, but “botched” is not one of them). More importantly, Facebook’s IPO received massive attention independent of its aggressive pricing strategy and NASDAQ’s tech glitches. Oh, and the company is now trading above its IPO price.

RELATED: Talking about that Twitter IPO

More importantly, we media folks don’t get household name tech IPOs very often, let alone ones for companies that help drive our own business. So we’re going to cover this like some amalgam of Marissa Mayer’s baby and the royal baby. Your strategy cannot overcome the public interest, nor our base inclinations.

So I’m sorry Twitter, but there is no way your IPO is going to be “low profile.” You may be able to help people topple governments, but you can’t do anything about this.

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