By Stanley Bing
January 5, 2009

1. Remain cheerful.

2. In any event refrain from getting apoplectic more than 2.7 times per day. In public, anyhow. If, you know, possible. Unless it’s for a strategic reason.

3. Keep my job.

4. Lose no money in the stock market. If that means having nothing to do with the stock market, all the better.

5. Punch anybody who uses the word “derivative” without laughing, unless they’re talking about movies.

6. Employ no PowerPoint except in jest.

7. Have no drink “for the road.”

8. Continue to abjure MySpace and Facebook, recognizing that people who use them for business purposes are nerds. 

9. Wear comfortable shoes.

10. Ignore all predictions.

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