By Stanley Bing
May 14, 2007

Caleb from San Antonio writes in response to my fantasy about buying a new cell phone: “Do you really get bored or do you just pretend to get bored? buy a hoe and turn some soil. your life sounds pretty nice to me. so you like bemelman’s in new york. what’s your favorite bar in california? we are going to take a trip to san francisco at the end of the summer.”

Unbeknownst to him, Caleb has wandered onto the sweet spot of my turf. There is nothing I love considering better than where to drink. You name a place, I’ve had a drink there. And I assure you, I’m still pretty functional.

In San Francisco, there are hundreds. Hundreds. I will give you three.

First, the Ritz Carlton. Timeless. Relaxed, oozing class. Caviar. Mind-bending sushi on some nights. Big, honest drinks. And a huge, sexy hotel quietly waiting just an elevator ride away. Next, Boulevard. Warm and yummy. The best food in the city — which is saying a lot — is also available at the bar. The Embarcadero is close by. And finally, Edinburgh Castle. Nestled in the heart of the reeking, sleazy heart of one of the worst cornices of the town. Every beer you can imagine is on tap. You can send out for the best fish and chips west of London. It is also a huge cultural mecca, with lots of gritty, arty stuff going on as the Guiness flows. They have pool tables there, too. Park close by. You don’t want to walk too far out there in the dark.

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